Memorializing Your Pet
As an Artist that regularly paints pet portraits, often times of dogs that have passed, and someone who also works in a veterinary hospital and deals with euthanasia, I’m passionate about preserving the memory of animals that are near and dear to us as well as healing our hearts while moving through the grief that comes with saying goodbye to a pet.
When it happens, it’s not just losing a pet - it’s getting adjusted to a new life without your best friend and member of the family. Grieving is never easy, but it is a part of life. It can be unbearably painful at times, and also heartfelt and special. The more you invest into your grieving process, the better you (and those that are grieving with you) will feel. An important thing to remember is that grieving and moving on with your life isn’t forgetting those that are gone - it’s accepting what has happened and carrying on in a healthy way in remembrance.
Recently I lost one of my dogs, Gromp. He was an 8 year old French Bulldog. I described him as my best friend and the love of my life - and he was. I felt understood by him, and I felt I understood him on a level that most people didn’t. I always knew that the day he passed would be the worst day of my life. In addition to being an Artist, I work part-time at a veterinary hospital. Gromp was always the number one reason I worked there. He had regular health issues and working there allowed me to reduce the costs of all his treatments, medications, and prescription diet food. A few months ago, he got really sick. Treatment worked to an extent, but with his diagnosis, we knew it would be about 6-8 weeks at least until he was on the path to healing. Unfortunately, he made great progress one week and then his health completely plummeted. We were on our way to the veterinary hospital to end his suffering, but Gromp passed away in my arms on the drive there. I like to think he was trying to make it easier on me. I constantly fought with the idea that maybe I was doing this too soon.
Knowing that Gromp’s end was coming helped me decide what I wanted to do with his remaining days, and also how I wanted to memorialize him when he was gone. If your pet is still with you, it may be beneficial to read my blog post Saying Goodbye to Your Pet as well. And if you’re in the unfortunate position of planning for the end, or you have recently lost your friend, read on for some ideas on how to show remembrance and move through your grief.
Disclaimer: Reading about euthanasia or a loved one passing isn’t easy on everyone. If death is a difficult subject for you, you may not want to read further. If you’re struggling with grief, I recommend reaching out to the Pet Compassion Careline which offers 24/7 Grief Support at 1 (855) 245 - 8214
Take ink impressions of their paws.
Get an ink pad (like one used for stamps) and some nice paper from a stationary shop. Gently rub their paw on the ink pad until it’s heavily saturated and stamp their paw on the paper. Use a hard surface behind the paper so the paper doesn’t crinkle. I recommend taking a couple paw impressions on a few different sheets of paper. You can then frame one and hang it in your home, hang it on your fridge, fold it up and carry it in your wallet with you, or make it into a fun and creative project! That’s Gromp’s ink paw print to the left - seeing it makes me feel like I still have a piece of him with me.
Have a pet portrait commissioned.
I may be biased, but having a portrait of your pet created is a unique and special way to memorialize them and keep them in your thoughts. If that is something you’re interested in from me, you can take a look at some of my work or request a commission. Painting cherished pets is a very special passion to me, and knowing what these pieces mean to the recipient makes my heart so full. There are many different options that I offer, and price points if you’re on a budget. However, if my painting style isn’t something you’re into, I recommend checking out Etsy for other Artists offering custom pet portraits.
Decide what you would like to do with their remains.
If you’re choosing cremation, would you like to hold on to their ashes, spread them somewhere special, or both? Did you know you can use their ashes to grow a tree? Or add some of the ashes into the ink of a tattoo? You can also have their ashes encased in stone or jewelry. There are many options if you go this route.
If you’re burying them, keep in mind that you should only bury them on your property, and you must call your city before digging to find out what infrastructure is below, if any. Next, consider what you would like to do in regards to grave markers. You can buy nice stones online, make a cute DIY concrete marker with paw prints, or plant flowers. Check out Pinterest for some inspiration!
Have a paw print made with their impression.
This is one of my favourite ways to memorialize your pet. The idea of your pets paw being imprinted forever in clay or plaster makes me feel like they’re not that far away, their paw is right there for you to grasp again. One really lovely company that I have worked with personally and am a bit obsessed with, is Spawts Impressions Inc. They provide paw prints and other keepsakes that are absolutely stunning - you’ve gotta check them out! I swear I’m not sponsored by them. I recommend purchasing your pawprint in advance so the clay can come in time for you to get the impression before your pet passes. If your pet has already passed though, they can still create an impression from another clay or plaster paw print, or even an ink print!
Have a memorial service.
The grief that is felt from the passing of your pet is likely not solely experienced by you. If others are grieving with your loss, gather with your close friends and family, or anyone who really loved your pet, and share stories and your favourite moments with everyone. Even better, make it and event and do it over yummy food and drinks. Don’t forget to raise a glass in their memory! You can also turn it into a donation event. Ask everyone invited to bring an item to be donated to a local pet shelter, whether it’s a toy, bed, blanket, dish, whatever! Image how good that would feel to get to help other animals through the memory of your pet.
Light a candle in remembrance.
This is such a sweet way to acknowledge the passing of a loved one. When my uncle passed, we had a family dinner and set the table, setting a place specifically for him, and had a candle of remembrance on his plate. It’s a nice way of saying that even though they are gone physically, they are still with us. I like to light a tealight when it’s time to feed dinner to my other dog, Humphrey. It’s a quick little way for me to acknowledge that I still think about Gromp all the time, it’s become a nice tradition.
Make a scrapbook or collage.
I love the idea of a group project of making a scrapbook or collage with your kids or friends that are also grieving the loss. During a time of hardship and pain, it’s important to lean on your support system and spend time with the people that love and care for you. Being creative in this fun, social way can be an excellent bonding experience. Even if you’re taking on a project like this alone, it will be great to take the time to embrace all the memories you had, as well as keep your mind busy.
Write to your pet.
No matter how your pet went, people often have trouble letting go of the guilt that comes with the end of their life. I had a very hard time with the guilt of Gromp’s passing and I found that writing him a letter greatly helped process those feelings. I let my thoughts and feelings pour out of me and with a solid sob session later I felt like I had said a heartfelt goodbye and moved through some of the negative feelings about his passing.
Get a tattoo.
I looove seeing pet tattoos! I think it’s so sweet. Gromp had a little numbered breeder tattoo on his inner leg. About a year before he passed, I decided to get the same numbers tattooed on me so we had a matching tattoo. Now that he’s passed, it’s even more special to me. And even though I already have a tattoo for him, I think I’ll still get his portrait tattooed one day as well. I think when the time comes, I won’t personally do this, but I’ve seen people get some of the ashes integrated in the ink for their memorial tattoo. Very cool idea! If you wanted to go down that route, I would suggest doing lots of research when it comes to the artist you use, and ask if they have done that before (some artists may not be comfortable with doing it). Also, I made a TikTok of my experience when I got this tattoo, if you want to check it out, go here.
Plant a tree.
While you can solely plant a tree in their remembrance, you can actually plant a tree using their ashes too. Isn’t that the coolest? If I can be anything after I die I’d definitely want to be a tree! TreeUrn offers a kit to use your pets ashes to grow into a tree as well as other interesting memorial pieces. I’m planning to do this with some of Gromp’s ashes. I’ll be planting his tree along one of our favourite forested walks so he can grow and thrive for a very long time.
Create a memorial space.
I made my memorial shelf (pictured to the left) for Gromp, which includes a few elements I’ve spoken about already. I collected together his ashes, paw print, favourite toys, leash, and framed a photo of him, as well as his ink paw print with a handkerchief he would wear. I finished it off with a quote from one of my favourite spoken word poems, “A Letter to My Dog” by Andrea Gibson. Your memorial space can be as minimal or maximal as you like, I’ve seen a framed photo next to ashes, and full-on shrines - they’re all great!
Make a playlist.
When it comes to a lover, it can be really easy to whip up a cute little playlist that reminds you of them, but I didn’t think there would be that many songs that reminded me of Gromp until I actually started making my playlist. I definitely recommend doing this yourself, it can be very cathartic. There are other pre-made playlists out there for this very purpose, but I’m a fan of making my own and customizing a playlist to my taste. If you’d like to listen to the playlist I made with Gromp in mind, here’s the link on Spotify. Enjoy!
Bake some yummy treats.
Bake some pet-safe treats and give them to all of your pets friends owners, local shelters, or daycares and boarding facilities (with ingredient lists for pets with allergies). There are soo many fantastic recipes to be found on Pinterest, like this one from Garden Therapy, for homemade dog treats! Go a step further and add cute little memorial labels on the treats. I made some treats recently and gave them to all the dog owners I knew - they loved them! It felt like a special way to say thank you for all the time my dog got to play with theirs.
Get a custom pet pillow.
I love the aesthetic of the cut-out photo pet pillow. There are many companies and small businesses that make these cute pillows, the picture shown is from The Pet Pillow. But if you’d like to support small creators, I’d check out Etsy - there are some great affordable options there! And of course, you can always make your own version! I have previously painted a silhouette portrait of Gromp on canvas, embroidered it, and made it into a pillow - it definitely felt a little more special and unique to me.
Donate.
Some shelters only survive because of donations, so donations are always appreciated. Aside from monetary donations, you can always donate food and supplies to shelters. If you’re strapped for cash, you can donate your time in your pet’s name as well. Connecting with other pets may help your grieving process too. One of my favourite donation ideas is to donate a bucket of balls or toys to your favourite dog park in their name, like the photo to the left. Go a step further and build a permanent ball or toy library outside your home, or by their favourite park or trail that you restock regularly.
Post a heartfelt message on social media.
This can be a nice way to get your thoughts out, to share memories, and to let everyone know they have passed (if they don’t already). I often use social media to share big news and to share my feelings about big life events, sometimes in a poetic way. This may not be for you, and if not, you can always opt to write how you feel in a letter to your pet instead. Either way, you can always share your favourite pictures of them! I was surprised to find after I posted about Gromp the outpouring of love and support I received. Sometimes sharing your grief can bring you closer to those around you.
Foster, dogsit, or adopt.
While I don’t recommend racing to get another pet, if you’re feeling a giant hole in your life from the loss of your pet, fostering may be a good option for you. I’ve been struggling with the desire to get another dog, but I know it’s not the right time. I feel like something big is missing in my life with Gromp being gone, but rushing to get another dog will not get rid of my grief. Instead I’m looking into fostering a dog, and I’ve started dog walking on Rover. Putting all the extra love I have into other animals has been so rewarding. If you’re looking for a dog walker or dog sitter in the Squamish area, find me on Rover! Get $20 off your first booking by using the promo code ‘ALECIC75014’!
Get support.
Losing a pet is always hard and there’s a mixture of emotions that you may expect and that may take you by surprise. Reach out to those close to you for support. If you’re struggling with the loss of your pet and don’t have someone to talk to about it, or want to speak to someone that understands your grief, there is a Pet Compassion Careline through Until We Meet Again which offers 24/7 Grief Support at 1 (855) 245 - 8214
Losing a pet is always difficult. Just remember, you’re not alone in this. I hope that reading this has given you some ideas on how you would like to remember your dear, sweet animal friend. No matter how you choose to memorialize them, they will be with you forever in your heart. Take care.
